Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

The (hilarious) effects of the space-based laser weapon from Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Nuclear supremacy

This cut sequence from Diamonds Are Forever (1971) showing the power of Blofeld’s space laser is absolutely hilarious. Adding to the camp of the movie, this seemingly quickly put together, crude sequence looks to be more of an inspiration for an Austin Powers movie rather than a flex of a Bond villain’s power.

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Diamonds Are Forever GIF (1971)

Where is Blofeld?

Diamonds Are Forever GIF (1971)Hehehe one of the funnier James Bond GIFs from Diamonds Are Forever (1971).

BAM!

This BAM! moment from Diamonds Are Forever (1971) always reminded me of the old onomatopoeia words from fights in the live-action Batman television show from the 1960s.

It doesn’t involve a fight with Sean Connery’s Bond, but only serves to convey Bond’s quick departure from his phone call with Q when Bond realizes he has to cover his tracks with a newly escaped Peter Franks. While Bond congratulates Q on his successful fingerprint scam gadget, it’s kind of neat to check out what’s going on in the background at Q Branch. It looks like one of the few instances where we see a Q Branch Bond car – in this case some sort of an Aston Martin – getting serviced (they’re installing its stinger missiles).

And it’s funny because in the next scene, Bond *does* fistfight Peter Franks ithat could get away with using some BAMs! POWs! or THWACKs! Oh well…

Diamonds Are Forever (1971) - BAM!

Sean Connery as James Bond in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Priceless

Sean Connery as James Bond in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Slumber Inc. in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Eternal Peace at Slumber, Inc.

Slumber Inc. in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Slumber Inc. in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Bond is almost cremated at Slumber, Inc. in Diamonds Are Forever (1971). The inside shots were done at Pinewood Studios in London, but the outside shot is legit! It’s a real mortuary in Las Vegas, NV named Palm Mortuary.

Willard Whye's signature sign in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Eat your heart out, Steve Wynn…

Willard Whyte Casino in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Willard Whye's signature sign in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Willard Whye's signature sign in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

Blow up your pants

The presence of James Bond’s daughter (eyeroll) in No Time To Die (2021) instantly reminded me of this awful, campy scene from Diamonds Are Forever (1971). Kids and James Bond movies do not mix. They instantly suck the energy out of any scene and annoy me as soon as they appear. Not only is it blatantly cringe that the kid is somehow in a Las Vegas casino (I guess they had kid friendly games in the 1970s? Regardless I would never want to bring a child to Las Vegas!), but his interaction with Tiffany Case (Jill St. John) is made even more awful with her line “Blow up your pants!” – a truly terrible one-liner on the Mount Rushmore of all bad James Bond movie one-liners.

Say no to kids in James Bond movies!

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

I’m not sure who’s creepier…

wintkidd

silva

Weren’t you a blonde when I came in?

Something about this seemingly innocuous scene (where James Bond meets Tiffany Case in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)) elevates its notoriety in my book. Maybe it’s the loungey, daydreamy, nap-inducing version of the DAF theme, or the way Bond questions endearingly “Weren’t you a blonde when I came in?” Something about it makes me love it. And the Van Cleef & Arpels quip…classic! 🙂

Diamonds Are Forever (1971) - Weren't you a blonde when I came in?

A little early for a drink…