diamonds are forever

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

Blow up your pants

The presence of James Bond’s daughter (eyeroll) in No Time To Die (2021) instantly reminded me of this awful, campy scene from Diamonds Are Forever (1971). Kids and James Bond movies do not mix. They instantly suck the energy out of any scene and annoy me as soon as they appear. Not only is it blatantly cringe that the kid is somehow in a Las Vegas casino (I guess they had kid friendly games in the 1970s? Regardless I would never want to bring a child to Las Vegas!), but his interaction with Tiffany Case (Jill St. John) is made even more awful with her line “Blow up your pants!” – a truly terrible one-liner on the Mount Rushmore of all bad James Bond movie one-liners.

Say no to kids in James Bond movies!

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

Me waiting for this awful scene to end

I’m not sure who’s creepier…

wintkidd

silva

Weren’t you a blonde when I came in?

Something about this seemingly innocuous scene (where James Bond meets Tiffany Case in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)) elevates its notoriety in my book. Maybe it’s the loungey, daydreamy, nap-inducing version of the DAF theme, or the way Bond questions endearingly “Weren’t you a blonde when I came in?” Something about it makes me love it. And the Van Cleef & Arpels quip…classic! 🙂

Diamonds Are Forever (1971) - Weren't you a blonde when I came in?

A little early for a drink…

 

Forever forever forever

Happy Global James Bond Day 2019!

Happy Global James Bond Day 2019!

57 years ago today, the first James Bond movie, Dr. No premiered.

The below graphic is composed of letters from different James Bond movies. Can you name the movie for each letter?

Happy Global James Bond Day 2019!

Happy Global James Bond Day 2019!

Check the answers for each letter after the jump!

Read More»
The "World's Greatest Marches" cassette tape plays an important role in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

World’s Greatest Marches on Cassette!

The "World's Greatest Marches" cassette tape plays an important role in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

The “World’s Greatest Marches” cassette tape plays an important role in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Bond uses this thrilling musical cassette tape as a decoy replacement for Blofeld’s satellite control tape in Diamonds Are Forever (1971). Controlling a satellite with a cassette tape – a terrible idea!

Blofeld's cat in For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Persian Cat Herding

Here are all of the times Ernst Stavro Blofeld’s feline friend made an appearance in the James Bond movies. Which cat is your favorite?

Blofeld's cat in From Russia With Love (1963)

Blofeld’s cat in From Russia With Love (1963)

Blofeld's cat in You Only Live Twice (1967)

Blofeld’s cat in You Only Live Twice (1967)

Blofeld's cat in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Blofeld’s cat in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Blofeld's cat in For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Blofeld’s cat in For Your Eyes Only (1981)

Blofeld's cat in Never Say Never Again (1983)

Blofeld’s cat in Never Say Never Again (1983)

Blofeld's cat in Spectre (2015)

Blofeld’s cat in Spectre (2015)

"James Bond Will Return" from the end of From Russia With Love (1963)

All “James Bond Will Return” Screenshots

“James Bond Will Return” is a signature phrase splashed at the end of (almost) every James Bond movie that promotes 007’s never-give-up/against-all-odds attitude and shows a sense of pride in the world’s longest running movie series.

Throughout the years, it has been used to reveal the movie title of the forthcoming James Bond movie, albeit sometimes in error. It has also not been used at all. Some quick facts:

Regardless, below are all of the instances where “James Bond Will Return” appears in the credits from all of the movies:

Which is your favorite?

Dr. Tynan (Henry Roland) makes a ridiculous jerking motion after being stung by a scorpion planted by Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

An epiphany or a scorpion sting?

Dr. Tynan (Henry Roland) makes a ridiculous jerking motion after being stung by a scorpion planted by Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)

Dr. Tynan (Henry Roland) makes a ridiculous jerking motion after being stung by a scorpion planted by Mr. Wint and Mr. Kidd in Diamonds Are Forever (1971)