Gun Barrel Theme.
Saida: “Ah! I’ve lost my charm!”
James Bond: “Not from where I’m standing.”
Lazar: “Mr. Bond, bullets do not kill. It is the finger that pulls the trigger.”
James Bond: “Exactly. I am now aiming precisely at your groin, so speak or forever hold your peace.”
Porter: “I open champagne?”
James Bond: “No, it’s a surprise.”
Porter: “Oh, surprise-hehe.”
James Bond: “It certainly gives you a new slant.”
MI6 Officer: “What with the Chinese on one side and the American fleet on the other, down here is the only place in Hong Kong you can’t be bugged!”
James Bond: “Good morning, how’s the water?”
Miss Chewme: “Why don’t you come in and find out?”
James Bond: “Sounds very tempting, Miss?”
Miss Chewme: “Chewme.”
James Bond: “Really? Well there’s only one small problem. I have no swimming trunks.”
Miss Chewme: “Neither have I.”
Boy: “Elephant, bargain mister 100 bud! Elephant, new elephant-50 bud. You are a very handsome man 40 bud-for you mister, 20 bud!”
James Bond: “I will tell you what, sonny, I will give you 20,000 bud if you can make this heap go any faster.”
Boy:“20,000 bud!”
James Bond:“I’m afraid I’ll have to owe you!”
Boy:“Bloody tourist! 20,000 bud!”
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “Haha haha haha! I knew it! You pordy heads have no more idea of traffic control than a goony bird! Haha!”
[Sheriff J.W. Pepper is with an elephant]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “Get you’re cotton pickin’ snoz out of my pants, you know! Boy you is ugly!-..aaahh!”
[J.W. is thrown into the water by the elephant]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper’s Wife: “J.W., where are you?”
[James is about to draw his gun on Scaramanga]
Francisco Scaramanga: “I wouldn’t do that either. Look behind you. Lower-“
[James notices Scaramanga’s henchman Nick Nack]
James Bond: “A gun and a bag of peanuts, how original. What will they think of next?”
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “How’s about my demonstration boy”
James Bond: “Certainly sir!”
Sheriff J.W Pepper: “What the hell is going on?!”
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “Now! I know you!”
James Bond: “Oh no!”
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “You’re that secret agent! That English secret agent from England!”
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “Nearest bridge is two miles back. God damn! What the?! What’s going on? What the hell you doing now boy! The bridge is that way!”
[James spots an old ramp that could cross the river-but the middle part is missing]
Sheriff J.W. Pepper: “You’re not thinking-..”
James Bond: “I sure am, boy! Ever heard of Evil Knievel?”
[They jump the broken bridge in the car, doing a corkscrew on the way over]
Sheriff J.W Pepper: “Wooowwwwwwww! Woweeeee! I’ve never done that before!”
James Bond: “Well neither have I actually!”
M: “So if I heard correctly, Scaramanga got away.”
James Bond: “Yes, sir.”
M: “In a car that sprouted wings.”
Q:“Oh that’s perfectly feasible sir, as a matter of fact we are working on one now-“
M:“Oh Q, shut up! And Miss Goodnight was in the boot?”
James Bond: “Yes sir. We found the car-plane abandoned about 200 miles west of Bangkok.”
M: “And the Solex?”
Lt. Hip: “In Goodnight’s handbag, sir.”
M: “Where’s Goodnight now?”
James Bond:“We don’t know sir.”
M: “Oh!”
James Bond: “Well communications aren’t picking up the signal from the homer she has supplied by Q.”
Q: “Rubbish! They simply are not stepping up the reception enough to enable-“
M: “Oh shut up, Q!”
[Scaramanga’s guards spot a plane approaching]
Chinese Guard:“There is a small sea plane approaching your island. Do you want us to take any action?”
[Scaramanga’s phone conversation, only his responses]
Francisco Scaramanga:“No, no please don’t do anything. Yes, it’s a guest I am expecting. No, he won’t be leaving.”
James Bond: “You live well, Scaramanga.”
Francisco Scaramanga: “At a million dollars a contract I can afford to, Mr. Bond. You work for peanuts, a hearty well done from her Majesty the Queen and a pittance of a pension. Apart from that we are the same. To us, Mr. Bond, we are the best.”
James Bond: “There’s a useful four letter word, and your full of it.”
James Bond: “I’ve never killed a midget before, but there can always be a first time.”
Nick Nack: “Oh monsieur!”
Mary Goodnight: “Oh James!”
[A telephone rises out from a compartment next to the bed; it rings]
Mary Goodnight: “What’s the matter?”
James Bond: “Something came up. Hello?”
M: “Ah, there you are, Bond! Well done, congratulations!”
James Bond: “Thank you, sir.”
M:“Is Miss Goodnight with you? I would like a word with her?”
James Bond: “Hold on, sir.”
M: “Bond, Bond are you there? Goodnight?”
James Bond: “She’s just coming sir.”
M: “Goodnight? Goodnight?? Goodnight!”
James Bond: “Goodnight sir!”
